September

September is the longest month of this year. Or, at least, that's what it feels like. It's dragging on and on and on. It's almost as bad as my Chemistry class in high school where my teacher's voice was a drone in my ear. I remember trying to stab myself with a pencil a couple of times to end my misery.

I just can't wait till October. Francis and I see each other one weekend every month, which isn't so bad taking into consideration he lives in Montreal and I live on the opposite end, south of the continent. During the summer, the weeks in between visits went by pretty quick. But this month has taken its toll. My patience is thinning and I'm short of going nuts.

I knew, from the start, that I would eventually be feeling this way, but I find no regret in diving into the relationship as if I had nothing to lose. He's worth it. He keeps me grounded. He balances out every part of me.

So this is me, a big bag of mush, ready to make my friends puke.

And even though September is almost over, it's as if every minute lasts an hour. I've never really been popular because of my waiting skills. On the other hand, I'm notorious for making people wait.

Being late

Last night, Francis told me he would teach me the tricks to waking up early and being on time.

Yeah, uh-huh.

That is an incredible feat.

Something my parents couldn't force me to do.

I suppressed a snicker.

I will give him a chance.

I already warned him that the first couple of months will be rough. He will eventually meet the Ultimate Warrior Bitch. He seemed unfettered.

I give him credit for his courage. He is brave. Everyone knows that I am the Medusa-incarnate at 6 o'clock in the morning.

Montreal Part 2

I was in Montreal 3 weeks ago. I didn't get to eat at G's as she was busy and everything was done in a rush. I miss her curry (Yes, Babe, I like curry, but you like Linkin Park, so we're even.) I met the infamous Joey, who likes me "so, I shouldn't fuck it up." Most, if not all, of my time was spent with Francis. Of course. Four days of funny looks, holding hands, after-hour talks, and love after love after love.

I met his family and then some. I was roasted like I've never been roasted before. I sat in the middle of that living room, that room I will never forget, while his family joked about marriage. Ha-ha. I turned red and almost shit in my pants. Ha-ha. I kept looking up at Francis to save me, but he turned red and almost shit in his pants. I sat there and laughed with the rest of them because it amused me. That, ha-ha, it's gonna happen before they know it. I wonder what they would have done if either me or Francis made "the announcement." (At this point, Francis, as you read this, I bet you are keeling over.)

Not much sight-seeing, but tons of family gatherings.

I miss it all. I miss him. I have been bitten on the ass by the lovebug.

To those who think I'm cheesy: Ha-ha. You're just jealous!

For those of you who think you're smart

See how many differences you can see in one minute. I found all 10. Ha-ha.

Weirdness

So, I almost lost it yesterday. "It" being the speckle of sanity I have left from 23 years of being...something a.k.a. sister, daughter, friend, enemy, bitch, antagonist, fire-starter, macho, blah blah blah. Thanks to Francis and CBF, I am back to normal, well, as normal as I can be (which doesn't count for much).

The house issue, I am no longer worried about. I have enough gray hairs as it is.

I now wish to go back to photography, but I am in that stage of "If only...I had a better camera, a wandering eye, a tripod, artistic inclination, etc. etc."

In my mundane yet organized life, I found that I miss peanut butter M&M's carefully propped on my bellybutton. No special tricks here, just yummy peanut butter and chocolate and a bellybutton that has seen better days.

I haven't gone to the gym in a week. I am fat and bloated. There goes $37/month.

I am broke but I'm happy (which makes me sound like a fatter but cuter version of A. Morissette.) Ok, maybe not so broke. Just shopping-deprived.

It's gotten colder in the mornings and our main light in the bathroom is dead. This means that I have to turn on the vanity lights that are hooked up to the vent, which makes it cold as hell and harder to jump out of the bath. Also, it leads to "cutting glass," if you know what I mean.

Summer has officially ended. Shit. Good-bye tank tops. Hello dysfuntional sweaters. Francis knows I am no good in cold weather. And this does not help with the fact that we may be spending Christmas in Montreal. Another scenario of "cutting glass."

I actually came in to work on time. Seven a.m. on the dot, sucker.

I love coffee. I've been jumpy lately. I drink an average of 3 cups a day. I have it with everything, even pizza. Maybe I should get off it. I'm not addicted. I don't see things in the corner of my room. I'm not an insomniac. I have ten fingers. My leg shakes when it's at rest. Maybe I should stop drinking coffee. Maybe I have a twin somewhere. Why do I see people in the corner of my eye?

Does health insurance include annual examinations for mental stability? I have PPO. That shit is expensive. It should, at least, cover brain cell counting. Seriously, now.

Transitions

I'm a bit melancholy for reasons I have yet to figure out. I hung out with a couple friends from work to say farewell two of our co-workers have moved to different programs. I wanted to go home to Francis. I miss him all the time and these are the moments when the reality of being apart is depressing. I wanted to go home to the comfort of my Mom's arms and funny stories, but she was asleep when I arrived.

I'm a little scared, to be honest, of the many decisions I have made. I don't know where to start. I'm a little overwhelmed. The house. The job.

We finally made an offer on a house, which sits on top of a hill. The view is spectacular. The lot is huge. The house that sits on it is a different story. There are no closets. It is small. The layout is confusing. It will cost thousands of dollars to make it nicer. But I own it. My brother owns it. My family will live there. And we'll make the best of it.

I am blessed and I am grateful. Thank God He is always with me.